L: So John, firstly, can you tell me, are you a custard or a jelly type of guy?
J: I like to mix both together into a slurry, so they are indistinguishable.
L: Fair enough. Who has been the biggest influence on your professional career?
J: Isaiah Saunders, the boss at Channel 7 Corporate. One of the best bosses I have ever known, as he put people before work.
L: You’ve worked under him?
J: Yes, he was my last boss.
L: Oh awesome! And where are you working now?
J: Is this part of the interview… or off the record?
L: Off the record until you say something interesting… then it is definitely on!
J: Oh well, I’ll keep my answers boring then…um.. I work for myself as a freelancer. Anyhow, where were we?
L: We were just about to discuss your music tastes. All time favourite album?
J: I’m probably doing to regret saying this, but I love Powder Finger Odessy No 5. Every song is quality, but I’ve played it to death. I guess the Snow Patrol album gets a lot of airtime lately too.
L: Good to know (I’m great at those pointless little ‘moving on’ phrases, hey). My last question, it’s a Rove favourite – who would you turn gay for?
J: Oh, I would turn gay for Bert Newton. He has so much charisma.
L: Oh that’s gold, the press will go wild with that!
J: Or Ellen Degeneras. She’s really fun… If a gay guy hooks up with a gay girl, is it still a gay relationship?
John continued to ponder that thought for a few moments – I thought it was really best to end things there. So there we go. A silly little interview to get the ratings up!